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Wedding Etiquettes



By Sarabpreet Kaur

Looks like it is time for guests — including friends and family — to give the courtesy part of social decorum during nuptials a serious thought!

Please Note: This article has been written by Sheena Agarwaal, the director of Urbanista Image Consultancy.

 

Much have been said and written about the topic of Wedding Etiquette, but we all tend to forget some of the most basic courtesy that must be extended to the bride and groom, and their family.
In order to refrain from getting bookish, I had a casual chat with over 16 married couples that got married in the last 4 years. And here is what came out as mere requests, if I may say so, of the brides and grooms to their friends and family in terms of appropriateness. Check them out…

-RSVP Well In Advance.
I had all 14 couples mention that friends and family would not finalize their plans until the nth moment, resulting in a lot of stress for the organizers. It is only fair to expect that the guests revert well in time and not be messaging the bride or groom, 10 minutes before the ring exchange about their arrival or reason for absence. All small talks and conversations can wait for the next day. One definitely can tell whether or not they have received the invite, thanking the hosts for it and confirming their presence or absence.

-No Desperate Class Participation Please.
How many brides have had 10 different people forcing their opinion on them whilst they are getting ready? I wish you heard that voice in her head—“STOP!” Don’t crowd them, for the bride and groom already have enough to worry about the hyped ‘big change’. In all fairness, I also believe that everyone means well but if you know that the bride and groom as taken care of, you should leave them to just be.

-Keep excessive information to yourself.
I don’t know of a bride or groom who is really interested in knowing what went amiss during the any function or who said what to whom. Reserve all comments to after the wedding. For now, let the bride and groom enjoy.

-Participate.
We all know of people (and let’s accept it—we have all been tempted to be one of them more often than not) who make it for the wedding celebrations but either don’t turn up for some rituals or are always ridiculously late. Remember that the families of the bride and groom have put in extensive efforts to put together every minute detail for the wedding and it is absolutely disrespectful to just conveniently be late.

-Don’t make commitments you think you cannot fulfill.
It is great to help the bride and groom with a task, taking on a responsibility. Just participating in family sangeet can also be a great help. However, if you know you won’t be able to do it, just say. You cannot rather be tagged as someone who is unreliable or someone who can back out from the sangeet minutes before you are to go on-stage. As they say, the show must (and will) go on. It only throws you under a very different light and stresses out the already stressed family. And then you complain about Bridezillas! Ah! 

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